"From His Heart to My Spirit"

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No one really knows whats going on inside:
No one knows the nights when alone I cried:
I don't understand the reason for all the pain:
But I pray the saying  is true "no pain, no gain":

Either way I'm a winner, but I feel I need more time:
I want to be sure I"m right because my life is on the line:
You can't tell people how you really feel:
Because they'll think your faith in God is not really real:

But God and I have an understanding, we talk one on one:
He's been by my side since my new life with him begun:
But the pain gets so bad I can't bear it alone:
I guess this is when I lift my eyes up toward home:

I know I am needed here and I know great love:
But nothing compares to what I feel from my father up above:
I walk and talk alone with my God:
I cry and ask why when the path of pain I have to trod:

I don't mean to question, he has a reason I know:
Its just a painful process, the healing comes so slow:
Sometimes I feel the need to be held as a small child:
But I just look at others and on my face place a smile:

When they ask how I am, I can't really say:
That I don't think I can make it another day:
But instead I give "them" hope and look them in the eye:
And say I'm feeling better when I really want to cry:

"Can't you see I feel so down and out":
But I am expected to have faith and be up and about;
And I know I can do it, I really can:
I'll just pull within and use the God man:

My family needs me Lord and I have work to do:
I have words to say and songs to sing to you:
I feel so tired at times and can't seem to go on any more:
The battle's really bad, I hope to win the war:

I'm trying to keep the faith through the dark and lonely night:
Please help me God, give me the strength to fight:
My body is weak and my strength is almost gone:
Let me feel your presence now, please don't leave me alone:

Give me a vision Lord, your feet on the sands of time:
Put them in my dreams, place your hand in mine:
Dear God, I love you, even though I don't understand:
I guess thats why you're God and I am only Man.

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Painful Wait for The Death Angel. Sometimes God lets us look into the heart of
someone we love because they need to know there is someone out there that really knows how they feel
and can love them anyway.

By Harriett Dash 1999